Where do I begin?

Long time, no post.

When I started this blog, I envisaged that I would avidly write. I had a concept of what uni was like. I thought I knew where I was going; where I was heading; who I was going to become.

In some ways some of my expectations have been fulfilled.

But mostly it's like living on an intense rollercoaster. Everyday seems to churn up the unexpected. And I constantly surprise myself: in my reactions, my outlook on life, who I am turning into.

I don't know myself anymore.

This of course, is not necessarily a bad thing. If I was the same person as the naive girl who first came to university in late September then I really wouldn't have got much out of the experience at all. I was counting up in my head all the experiences I have had and boy, are there a lot of firsts. First time living away from home; first time I've been to a nightclub; first alcoholic drinks; first attempts at cuisine; first kiss; first boyfriend; first time I'm going to New York; first time I'm going on tour; first lease I've signed on a house for next year; first time I've thrown a party; first time I've had proper friendships; first formal; first Valentines day; first time I've been sent roses, first- well, I could go on, but trust me in this: there are a lot of firsts.

I am confident that this is only the beginning. There is an awful lot more out there and by no means have I experienced everything that university has to offer, but I still have three more years of university ahead of me, so there's plenty of time to get more involved on the society side of it- in terms of thinking of jobs and practicalities etc. This year has been about growing up; finding my feet; making the transition from dependent to independent. Basically, about life experiences.

Admittedly, I have not been wholly happy. It's had it's (many many) ups and downs. Lots of it, particularly this term, has been characterised by anguish and indecision. In making way for the new, I have had to let go of some of the much-loved old.

As for the future? I don't just know.

As for the present?

I rest optimistic.